Crap Towns / Kent / Royal Tunbridge Wells
Royal Tunbridge Wells
39/100Crap Score
Known as T-Dubz. Also Sunny Tunny.
598th crappest of 984 towns, and 26th in Kent. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Tunbridge Wells. Disgusted, obviously.
The Pantiles, a spa that tastes of rusty nails, and taps that keep running dry.
Royal Tunbridge Wells is posh, pretty and permanently pissed off. Leave off the Royal and somebody writes to the paper. Mix it up with Tonbridge and they'll write again. It's got the Pantiles and a spa that tastes of rusty nails. The taps keep running dry and the old cinema site has sat empty for years.
Then there's the Heritage at Risk register, and what's on it is Royal Tunbridge Wells. Not a building in it. The whole conservation area. Disgusted doesn't cover it. About 15% of premises still can't get gigabit broadband, so the outraged emails take a while.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Royal Tunbridge Wells's 86 for broadband means it's crapper than 86% of towns.
- Broadband86/10015.3% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 19.2% across the Tunbridge Wells council area
- Serious road collisions69/1003.0 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Anti-social behaviour57/10016.2 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Air pollution51/1007.6 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 7.0 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Criminal damage and arson50/1007.1 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Rain46/100126 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Sewage spills31/10097.7 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2024 to 2025
- Fly-tipping28/1006.1 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Tunbridge Wells council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Food hygiene19/1001.5% rated 0 to 2, of the 408 food businesses with a rating
- Deliberate fires9/1002.5 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 22 | Swanscombe | 48 |
| 23 | Broadstairs | 47 |
| 24 | Hythe | 44 |
| 25 | Tonbridge | 43 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.26 | Royal Tunbridge Wells | 39 |
| 27 | Larkfield | 38 |
| 28 | Deal | 36 |
| 29 | Herne | 32 |
| 30 | Sevenoaks | 27 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Royal Tunbridge Wells by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 69.7 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 9% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 11 reports of fly-tipping on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 2.1 per 10,000 people, 1.9x the typical town's 1.1
- 5 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2025
What's left on the high street
- 31 pubs, 8 hairdressers, 5 charity shops, 1 bookmaker, 8 banks, 2 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 5.4% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (2 of 37) Worse: 35% higher than the typical town's 4.0%
- 8 public toilets on the map (October 2026) About the same: 1.6 per 10,000 people, about the same as the typical town's 1.6
- 5 public swimming pools open; 2 closed for good since 2010 Better: 1.0 per 10,000 people, 43% higher than the typical English town's 0.7
- 1 place on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.01pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 1.2% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 2.4x the typical town's 0.5%
- 8.6% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 45% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,655 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Better: 8% higher than the typical town's 1,532
Tunbridge Wells council
Have a crap-off
Royal Tunbridge Wells against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.