Crap Towns / Kent / Hythe
Hythe
44/100Crap Score
548th crappest of 984 towns, and 24th in Kent. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Grown men on toy trains.
A military canal, a shingle beach and a toy railway full of grown men.
Hythe has a tiny steam railway to Dungeness, and grown men queue up to cram themselves into it. There's a canal dug to keep Napoleon out and a shingle beach that gets in your shoes and stays there. The kids have nothing to do, people park on the pavement and the high street is charity shops. It's alright. It's just small. Like the trains.
The sun's out for 1,912 hours a year and the sea's rated Excellent, which would be more of a draw if the storm overflows nearby hadn't spilled for 2.7 times as long as the typical town's. There are public toilets at over four times the typical town's rate, for all the grown men getting off the little train.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Hythe's 86 for broadband means it's crapper than 86% of towns.
- Broadband86/10015.0% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 19.8% across the Folkestone and Hythe council area
- Fly-tipping76/10016.7 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Folkestone and Hythe council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Sewage spills75/100730 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2024 to 2025
- Serious road collisions65/1002.9 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Criminal damage and arson35/1006.0 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Air pollution32/1006.4 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.4 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Rain28/100120 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Food hygiene28/1001.2% rated 0 to 2, of the 85 food businesses with a rating
- Anti-social behaviour14/1009.1 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Deliberate fires10/1002.2 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 20 | Minster | 54 |
| 21 | Snodland | 50 |
| 22 | Swanscombe | 48 |
| 23 | Broadstairs | 47 |
| 24 | Hythe | 44 |
| 25 | Tonbridge | 43 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.26 | Royal Tunbridge Wells | 39 |
| 27 | Larkfield | 38 |
| 28 | Deal | 36 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Hythe by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 48.4 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 36% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 9 reports of fly-tipping on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 6.2 per 10,000 people, 5.6x the typical town's 1.1
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2022
- 2 of 2 bathing waters here or within 2 km rated Excellent in 2025
What's left on the high street
- 11 pubs, 12 hairdressers, 9 charity shops, 1 bank on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 1 cash machine closure assessed by LINK
- 10 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 6.8 per 10,000 people, 4.3x the typical town's 1.6
- 3 public swimming pools open Better: 2.1 per 10,000 people, 3x the typical English town's 0.7
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.43pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 1.7% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 3.4x the typical town's 0.5%
- 28.4% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 1.8x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,912 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Better: 25% higher than the typical town's 1,532
Folkestone and Hythe council
Have a crap-off
Hythe against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.