Crap Towns / Kent / Snodland
Snodland
50/100Crap Score
Known as Oddland.
489th crappest of 984 towns, and 21st in Kent. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Quarry dust on everything
Cement dust, quarry noise, bookies and nothing to do at night. The vandals are busy, though.
Snodland made paper and cement, and Ham Hill quarry still covers it in dust, diesel fumes and noise all night. The neighbours call it Snotland. Nice river. Roman villa. That's about it.
There are 2 pubs and 2 bookies, so of an evening it's a pint or a punt, and the last bus is at 9.53pm. The vandals don't go home, mind. Anti-social behaviour runs at 1.7 times the typical town's rate, and criminal damage isn't far behind. No public pool either. The dust gets everywhere anyway.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Snodland's 88 for criminal damage and arson means it's crapper than 88% of towns.
- Criminal damage and arson88/10011.3 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Air pollution86/10011.1 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 7.6 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Anti-social behaviour85/10023.4 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Deliberate fires59/1006.8 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Broadband48/1004.8% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 14.5% across the Tonbridge and Malling council area
- Food hygiene46/1002.1% rated 0 to 2, of the 47 food businesses with a rating
- Serious road collisions32/1001.9 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Sewage spills31/100103 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2024 to 2025
- Fly-tipping27/1007.1 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Tonbridge and Malling council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Rain14/100115 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 17 | Swanley | 59 |
| 18 | Whitstable | 56 |
| 19 | Ashford | 55 |
| 20 | Minster | 54 |
| 21 | Snodland | 50 |
| 22 | Swanscombe | 48 |
| 23 | Broadstairs | 47 |
| 24 | Hythe | 44 |
| 25 | Tonbridge | 43 |
Snodland by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 78.9 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 76.2
- 5 reports of litter and bins on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 4.2 per 10,000 people, 4.7x the typical town's 0.9
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2025
What's left on the high street
- 2 pubs, 7 hairdressers, 1 charity shop, 2 bookmakers on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 1 public toilet on the map (October 2026) Worse: 0.8 per 10,000 people, 50% lower than the typical town's 1.6
- None public swimming pools open Worse: Against the typical English town's 0.7 per 10,000 people
- 1 place on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 9.53pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.7% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 40% higher than the typical town's 0.5%
- 5.2% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 66% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,698 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Better: 11% higher than the typical town's 1,532
Tonbridge and Malling council
Have a crap-off
Snodland against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.