Crap Towns / Cheshire / Lymm
Lymm
21/100Crap Score
777th crappest of 984 towns, and 15th in Cheshire. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Find somewhere else to park.
Pretty Cheshire village with a dam, a canal and a duck race. And nowhere to put your car.
Lymm is a pretty, well-off Cheshire village with a dam, the Bridgewater Canal and a rubber duck race through the Dingle at Easter. Crime's low and it's very pleased with itself. There's a prehistoric footprint by the Lower Dam, which is about the only thing in Lymm older than the parking row.
Everyone drives because the evening buses run at about a third of the typical town's, then parks across somebody's drive by the dam. The village car park charges you for the privilege. The overflows dump sewage for two and a half times the typical town's hours, so the ducks have it worse than anyone.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Lymm's 77 for rain means it's crapper than 77% of towns.
- Rain77/100152 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Sewage spills73/100675 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Deliberate fires57/1006.3 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Food hygiene54/1002.9% rated 0 to 2, of the 69 food businesses with a rating
- Air pollution48/1008.6 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.3 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Serious road collisions31/1001.9 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Fly-tipping25/1007.0 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Warrington council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Broadband16/1003.7% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 4.0% across the Warrington council area
- Anti-social behaviour12/1005.8 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Criminal damage and arson1/1002.6 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 11 | Sandbach | 31 |
| 12 | Nantwich | 28 |
| 13 | Neston | 28 |
| 14 | Alsager | 22 |
| 15 | Lymm | 21 |
| 16 | Wilmslow | 21 |
| 17 | Poynton | 15 |
| 18 | Knutsford | 14 |
| 19 | Macclesfield | 12 |
Lymm by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 36.0 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 53% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 1 reports of litter and bins on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 About the same: 0.9 per 10,000 people, about the same as the typical town's 0.9
What's left on the high street
- 8 pubs, 7 hairdressers, 1 charity shop, 1 vape shop, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 2 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 1.7 per 10,000 people, 6% higher than the typical town's 1.6
- 1 public swimming pool open Better: 0.9 per 10,000 people, 29% higher than the typical English town's 0.7
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.01am last bus out on a Wednesday About the same: About the same as the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.4% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: 20% lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 11.6% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 25% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,470 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Warrington council
- £2,448 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £56 more than the English average
- 13% of Warrington council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 19% lower than England's 16%
- None ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Lymm against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.