Crap Towns / Greater Manchester / Bowdon
Bowdon
29/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 29. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
Got something to say about Bowdon? Write in.
agree it's crap have defended it
Bowdon looks down on Hale.
Bowdon's had its money since the cotton barons. Hale only got its in the last transfer window.
Bowdon sits on the hill above Altrincham in big old houses built by men who did very well out of cotton. It doesn't flash it about. That's Hale's job. You can walk the Devisdale and admire a lot of gates. Nipping out for milk is harder since the Vale lost its shops.
And then the sewage. The storm overflows round Bowdon spilled for 6,080 hours per 10,000 people a year, more than twenty-two times the typical town. All that money behind all those gates, and the shit still runs downhill.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Bowdon's 99 for sewage spills means it's crapper than 99% of towns.
- Sewage spills99/1006,080 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Rain76/100152 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Air pollution56/1009.5 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.5 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Broadband42/1007.5% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 6.0% across the Trafford council area
- Fly-tipping39/1009.2 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Trafford council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Food hygiene36/1000.0% rated 0 to 2, of the 19 food businesses with a rating
- Criminal damage and arson27/1005.4 per 1,000 people a year, July 2023 to June 2026
- Anti-social behaviour20/10010.3 per 1,000 people a year, July 2023 to June 2026
- Serious road collisions18/1001.3 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Deliberate fires13/1002.3 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 59 | Standish | 49 |
| 60 | Hale | 43 |
| 61 | Romiley | 42 |
| 62 | Urmston | 42 |
| 63 | Sale | 40 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.64 | Bramhall | 38 |
| 65 | Altrincham | 31 |
| 66 | Cheadle Hulme | 30 |
| – | Bowdon | 29 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Bowdon by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 69.6 crimes per 1,000 people a year (July 2023 to June 2026) Better: 9% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 2 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 About the same: 3.3 per 10,000 people, about the same as the typical town's 3.4
What's left on the high street
- 2 pubs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- None public swimming pools open; 1 closed for good since 2010 Worse: Against the typical English town's 0.7 per 10,000 people
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.19pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- Under 0.1% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: Far lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 24.0% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 1.5x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,457 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Trafford council
- £2,292 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £100 less than the English average
- 12% of Trafford council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 25% lower than England's 16%
- 9 ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Bowdon against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.