Crap Towns / Hampshire / Blackfield and Langley
Blackfield and Langley
24/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 24. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Smells like a petrol station.
New Forest on one side, oil refinery on the other. Pray for a westerly.
Blackfield and Langley? New Forest on the doorstep and an oil refinery next to that, so it's noise, stink and the odd bit of soot on the washing. The football ground is called Gang Warily. That's the most exciting thing here.
The local yobs keep setting fire to the forest, mind. Grass and woods go up at over four times the typical town's rate, which is one way to make the place smell of something other than the refinery. The library shut in 2020, there's no public pool, and over a quarter of premises can't get gigabit broadband.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Blackfield and Langley's 96 for broadband means it's crapper than 96% of towns.
- Broadband96/10027.5% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 22.6% across the New Forest council area
- Deliberate fires73/10011.0 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Serious road collisions54/1002.6 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Rain45/100125 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Food hygiene37/1000.0% rated 0 to 2, of the 17 food businesses with a rating
- Criminal damage and arson33/1005.8 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Fly-tipping30/1006.5 incidents per 1,000 people a year, New Forest council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Sewage spills29/10092.4 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2024 to 2025
- Air pollution26/1006.8 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 5.8 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Anti-social behaviour4/1006.6 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 7 | Eastleigh | 29 |
| 8 | Gosport | 28 |
| 9 | Totton | 28 |
| 10 | Petersfield | 26 |
| – | Blackfield and Langley | 24 |
| 11 | Aldershot | 23 |
| 12 | Tadley | 22 |
| 13 | Fareham | 20 |
| 14 | Lymington | 18 |
Blackfield and Langley by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 54.5 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 28% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 7 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 12.0 per 10,000 people, 3.5x the typical town's 3.4
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2025
What's left on the high street
- 2 pubs, 4 hairdressers, 1 charity shop on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 1 library shut for good since 2010: Blackfield (2020)
- None public swimming pools open Worse: Against the typical English town's 0.7 per 10,000 people
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 1.10am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 1.0% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 2x the typical town's 0.5%
- 19.7% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space, and OS maps no public park here Worse: 27% higher than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,789 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Better: 17% higher than the typical town's 1,532
New Forest council
- £2,420 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £28 more than the English average
- 8% of Hampshire County Council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 50% lower than England's 16%
- 2 ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Blackfield and Langley against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.