Crap Towns / Hampshire / Eastleigh
Eastleigh
29/100Crap Score
701st crappest of 984 towns, and 7th in Hampshire. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Eastleigh. Anagram of eagle shit.
The first Spitfire flew from here. Nothing else has taken off since.
Eastleigh was built round the railway works and has an airport on the doorstep, so it's very easy to leave. The first Spitfire took off from here, and the football club still calls itself the Spitfires. The town centre is empty units, vape shops and takeaways. Locals call it Beastleigh. Rearrange the letters and you get eagle shit.
The vape shops come to nearly five times the typical town's per head, so the precinct smells of blue raspberry. Over twice the typical town's share of its kitchens are rated 0 to 2, and some of them don't bear thinking about.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Eastleigh's 86 for food hygiene means it's crapper than 86% of towns.
- Food hygiene86/1005.2% rated 0 to 2, of the 229 food businesses with a rating
- Serious road collisions66/1002.9 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Air pollution56/10010.2 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.4 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Broadband55/1008.4% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 9.7% across the Eastleigh council area
- Rain43/100125 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Sewage spills43/100205 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2024 to 2025
- Criminal damage and arson24/1005.2 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Anti-social behaviour14/1008.9 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Deliberate fires12/1002.8 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Fly-tipping11/1004.9 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Eastleigh council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 3 | Portsmouth | 44 |
| 4 | Ringwood | 41 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.5 | Basingstoke | 38 |
| 6 | New Milton | 32 |
| 7 | Eastleigh | 29 |
| 8 | Gosport | 28 |
| 9 | Totton | 28 |
| 10 | Petersfield | 26 |
| 11 | Aldershot | 23 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Eastleigh by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 70.4 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 8% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 134 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 27.7 per 10,000 people, 8.1x the typical town's 3.4
- 5 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2026
What's left on the high street
- 17 pubs, 21 hairdressers, 9 charity shops, 5 bookmakers, 7 vape shops, 5 banks, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 6.1% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (2 of 33) Worse: 1.5x the typical town's 4.0%
- 2 bank branch closures announced since 2022 Worse: 4.1 per 100,000 people, 21% higher than the typical town's 3.4
- 7 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Worse: 1.4 per 10,000 people, 13% lower than the typical town's 1.6
- 3 public swimming pools open Worse: 0.6 per 10,000 people, 14% lower than the typical English town's 0.7
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 1.01am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 1.4% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 2.8x the typical town's 0.5%
- 9.9% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 36% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,649 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Better: 8% higher than the typical town's 1,532
Eastleigh council
- £2,342 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £50 less than the English average
- 8% of Hampshire County Council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 50% lower than England's 16%
- 1 ombudsman complaint upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Eastleigh against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.