Crap Towns / Kent / Tenterden
Tenterden
47/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 47. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Tenterden. Lovely. Broadband's crap.
A lovely wide High Street full of charity shops, and a steam train for people who fancy going to Bodiam.
Tenterden calls itself the Jewel of the Weald, and the High Street is lovely, wide and lined with trees. There's no mainline station, the evening buses give up early and the houses cost a fortune. The steam train goes to Bodiam Castle, which is nice if you want to go to Bodiam Castle.
The broadband's a joke: 4.3% of premises can't get superfast, over eight times the typical town's share. The storm drains round it chucked out sewage for nearly three times as long as the typical town's. The jewel's got a bit of shit on it.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Tenterden's 92 for broadband means it's crapper than 92% of towns.
- Broadband92/10019.5% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 24.0% across the Ashford council area
- Sewage spills77/100784 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2024 to 2025
- Criminal damage and arson68/1008.4 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Food hygiene57/1003.2% rated 0 to 2, of the 63 food businesses with a rating
- Serious road collisions46/1002.3 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Fly-tipping42/1009.7 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Ashford council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Deliberate fires37/1004.8 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Air pollution29/1005.9 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.5 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Rain25/100119 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Anti-social behaviour23/10010.7 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 19 | Ashford | 55 |
| 20 | Minster | 54 |
| 21 | Snodland | 50 |
| 22 | Swanscombe | 48 |
| – | Tenterden | 47 |
| 23 | Broadstairs | 47 |
| 24 | Hythe | 44 |
| 25 | Tonbridge | 43 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.26 | Royal Tunbridge Wells | 39 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Tenterden by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 58.9 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 23% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 2 reports of graffiti and fly-posting on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2018
What's left on the high street
- 4 pubs, 3 hairdressers, 8 charity shops, 2 banks on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 1 bank branch closure announced since 2022 Worse: 12.9 per 100,000 people, 3.8x the typical town's 3.4
- 6 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 7.7 per 10,000 people, 4.8x the typical town's 1.6
- 2 public swimming pools open Better: 2.6 per 10,000 people, 3.7x the typical English town's 0.7
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 10.30pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 4.3% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 8.6x the typical town's 0.5%
- 45.1% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 2.9x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,758 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Better: 15% higher than the typical town's 1,532
Ashford council
Have a crap-off
Tenterden against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.