Crap Towns / Greater Manchester / Stretford
Stretford
58/100Crap Score
410th crappest of 984 towns, and 53rd in Greater Manchester. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Stretty's a building site.
They're knocking down the precinct and putting up bars. Stretfordians wanted a bank and a butcher's.
Stretford used to be called Porkhampton, for all the pigs it sent into Manchester. Now the precinct's being knocked down a bit at a time and King Street's a maze of fences. The plans have bars in. What locals want is somewhere to buy a pair of socks. Longford Park's nice. The Stretford End's up the road, and that's all most people know it for.
For now it's 3 Greggs and 4 pubs, so the bars might at least even it up. The air's 1.7 times the typical town's for nitrogen dioxide, the hygiene inspectors hand out 0 to 2 nearly three times as often as in the typical town, and the banks have announced two closures since 2022. There's no pool.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Stretford's 89 for food hygiene means it's crapper than 89% of towns.
- Food hygiene89/1007.0% rated 0 to 2, of the 129 food businesses with a rating
- Air pollution89/10014.5 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 7.4 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Rain77/100152 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Deliberate fires76/10011.1 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Serious road collisions61/1002.7 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Sewage spills61/100426 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Fly-tipping39/1009.2 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Trafford council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Criminal damage and arson27/1005.4 per 1,000 people a year, July 2023 to June 2026
- Anti-social behaviour20/10010.3 per 1,000 people a year, July 2023 to June 2026
- Broadband20/1003.4% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 6.0% across the Trafford council area
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 49 | Ramsbottom | 65 |
| 50 | Marple | 64 |
| 51 | Golborne | 62 |
| 52 | Reddish | 60 |
| 53 | Stretford | 58 |
| 54 | Orrell | 56 |
| 55 | Stockport | 56 |
| 56 | Ashton-in-Makerfield | 51 |
| 57 | Hazel Grove | 50 |
Stretford by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 69.6 crimes per 1,000 people a year (July 2023 to June 2026) Better: 9% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 4 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 1.4 per 10,000 people, 59% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2021
What's left on the high street
- 4 pubs, 11 hairdressers, 3 bookmakers, 2 banks, 3 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 9.5% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (2 of 21) Worse: 2.4x the typical town's 4.0%
- 2 bank branch closures announced since 2022 Worse: 7.1 per 100,000 people, 2.1x the typical town's 3.4
- 2 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Worse: 0.7 per 10,000 people, 56% lower than the typical town's 1.6
- None public swimming pools open Worse: Against the typical English town's 0.7 per 10,000 people
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.51am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.2% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: 60% lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 4.2% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 73% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,402 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 8% lower than the typical town's 1,532
Trafford council
- £2,292 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £100 less than the English average
- 12% of Trafford council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 25% lower than England's 16%
- 9 ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Stretford against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.