Crap Towns / Greater Manchester / Salford
Salford
99/100Crap Score
13th crappest of 984 towns, and 2nd in Greater Manchester. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
Got something to say about Salford? Write in.
agree it's crap have defended it
Salford's not in Manchester, pal.
The BBC moved to the Quays. The rest of Salford got the vape shops and the fly-tipping.
Call a Salfordian a Manc and you'll get told. Fair enough, it's its own city. Down the Quays it's glass flats and telly people on lanyards. Walk inland and it's ginnels full of dumped mattresses, lads doing wheelies up Chapel Street and a Precinct that hasn't changed since the seventies. They're proud of that bit too.
The air's twice the typical town's for nitrogen dioxide. The fire brigade gets called out to a bin fire nearly ten times as often as in the typical town. And for all the media money down the Quays, nine times the typical town's share of premises can't get superfast broadband, and some can't even get the legal minimum speed. The telly people must be on the good bit.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Salford's 95 for air pollution means it's crapper than 95% of towns.
- Air pollution95/10016.6 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 7.8 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Food hygiene95/1007.0% rated 0 to 2, of the 714 food businesses with a rating
- Deliberate fires91/10023.0 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Fly-tipping88/10024.6 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Salford council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Criminal damage and arson82/10010.1 per 1,000 people a year, July 2023 to June 2026
- Serious road collisions81/1003.4 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Rain81/100157 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Anti-social behaviour74/10019.4 per 1,000 people a year, July 2023 to June 2026
- Sewage spills54/100331 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Broadband54/10010.3% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 5.8% across the Salford council area
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Manchester | 99 |
| 2 | Salford | 99 |
| 3 | Clifton | 98 |
| 4 | Farnworth | 98 |
| 5 | Eccles | 98 |
| 6 | Heywood | 97 |
| 7 | Kearsley | 96 |
| 8 | Walkden | 95 |
| 9 | Bolton | 94 |
Salford by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 104 crimes per 1,000 people a year (July 2023 to June 2026) Worse: 36% higher than the typical town's 76.2
- 4 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 0.4 per 10,000 people, 88% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 4 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2026
What's left on the high street
- 28 pubs, 25 hairdressers, 6 charity shops, 6 bookmakers, 18 vape shops, 6 banks, 5 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 8.3% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (12 of 145) Worse: 2.1x the typical town's 4.0%
- 2 bank branch closures announced since 2022 Better: 1.8 per 100,000 people, 47% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 14 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Worse: 1.3 per 10,000 people, 19% lower than the typical town's 1.6
- 3 public swimming pools open; 3 closed for good since 2010 Worse: 0.3 per 10,000 people, 57% lower than the typical English town's 0.7
- 7 places on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 1.57am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 4.5% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 9x the typical town's 0.5%
- 12.1% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 22% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,383 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 10% lower than the typical town's 1,532
Salford council
Have a crap-off
Salford against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.