Crap Towns / Greater Manchester / Kearsley
Kearsley
96/100Crap Score
42nd crappest of 984 towns, and 7th in Greater Manchester. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Everyone's been stuck in Kearsley
Kearsley Island at half five. That's all most people know about the place, and it's plenty.
Kearsley had pits, paper mills, a power station and a chemical works, and they've all gone. What it's got now is Kearsley Island, a roundabout at the end of the M61 where half of Bolton queues every morning. Plenty of pubs, which you'll need.
The storm overflows round Kearsley spilled for 3,002 hours per 10,000 people a year, eleven times the typical town. The industry's long gone and the air's still 1.7 times the typical town's for nitrogen dioxide, with everyone sat on the Island breathing it. More than one in eight food businesses with a rating gets 0 to 2 from the hygiene inspectors.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Kearsley's 98 for sewage spills means it's crapper than 98% of towns.
- Sewage spills98/1003,002 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Food hygiene92/10013.3% rated 0 to 2, of the 45 food businesses with a rating
- Fly-tipping90/10023.1 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Bolton council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Deliberate fires87/10018.9 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Air pollution86/10014.4 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 7.2 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Rain85/100161 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Criminal damage and arson65/1008.1 per 1,000 people a year, July 2023 to June 2026
- Serious road collisions54/1002.5 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Anti-social behaviour52/10015.5 per 1,000 people a year, July 2023 to June 2026
- Broadband20/1004.0% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 5.0% across the Bolton council area
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 3 | Clifton | 98 |
| 4 | Farnworth | 98 |
| 5 | Eccles | 98 |
| 6 | Heywood | 97 |
| 7 | Kearsley | 96 |
| 8 | Walkden | 95 |
| 9 | Bolton | 94 |
| 10 | Rochdale | 94 |
| 11 | Oldham | 94 |
Kearsley by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 96.7 crimes per 1,000 people a year (July 2023 to June 2026) Worse: 27% higher than the typical town's 76.2
- 1 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 0.9 per 10,000 people, 74% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 4 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2023
What's left on the high street
- 9 pubs, 7 hairdressers, 1 vape shop on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- None public swimming pools open Worse: Against the typical English town's 0.7 per 10,000 people
- 1 place on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.33am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.4% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: 20% lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 8.1% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 48% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,385 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 10% lower than the typical town's 1,532
Bolton council
Have a crap-off
Kearsley against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.