Crap Towns / Derbyshire / New Mills
New Mills
25/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 25. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
New Mills. Smells of sweets.
A walkway over a gorge, a river making electricity and a town centre that's seen better days.
New Mills has the Torrs, a walkway hanging over the gorge, its own community hydro scheme and a sweet factory that makes the whole town smell of sugar. All lovely. Then you go into town and it's vape shops, at 7.3 times the typical town's rate per head, charity shops and tatty buildings. Locals say it's short on frills and handy for the hills. Short on frills, certainly.
It pisses down on 169 days a year, which at least keeps the hydro going. Down in the gorge the storm overflows spill for 6.2 times as long as the typical town's, so the river's making electricity out of shit. Torr Vale Mill has ended up on the at-risk register. Nobody misbehaves much.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
New Mills's 91 for sewage spills means it's crapper than 91% of towns.
- Sewage spills91/1001,697 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Rain91/100169 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Broadband63/1008.0% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 14.7% across the High Peak council area
- Serious road collisions55/1002.6 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Food hygiene41/1001.8% rated 0 to 2, of the 57 food businesses with a rating
- Air pollution40/1007.2 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.6 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Anti-social behaviour10/1008.1 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Criminal damage and arson9/1004.0 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Fly-tipping6/1004.1 incidents per 1,000 people a year, High Peak council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Deliberate fires5/1001.4 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 11 | Ilkeston | 43 |
| 12 | Buxton | 42 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.13 | Hadfield | 36 |
| 14 | Long Eaton | 33 |
| – | New Mills | 25 |
| 15 | Brimington | 22 |
| 16 | Glossop | 16 |
| 17 | Swadlincote | 14 |
| 18 | Belper | 8 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
New Mills by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 47.9 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 37% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 3 reports of litter and bins on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 3.3 per 10,000 people, 3.7x the typical town's 0.9
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2021
What's left on the high street
- 6 pubs, 8 hairdressers, 4 charity shops, 2 vape shops on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 7.1% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (1 of 14) Worse: 1.8x the typical town's 4.0%
- 1 bank branch closure announced since 2022 Worse: 10.9 per 100,000 people, 3.2x the typical town's 3.4
- 4 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 4.3 per 10,000 people, 2.7x the typical town's 1.6
- 1 public swimming pool open Better: 1.1 per 10,000 people, 1.6x the typical English town's 0.7
- 1 place on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.23am last bus out on a Wednesday About the same: About the same as the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.7% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 40% higher than the typical town's 0.5%
- 5.9% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 62% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,346 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 12% lower than the typical town's 1,532
High Peak council
- £2,385 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £7 less than the English average
- 15% of Derbyshire County Council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 6% lower than England's 16%
- None ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
New Mills against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.