Crap Towns / Greater London / Lewisham
Lewisham
87/100Crap Score
130th crappest of 984 towns, and 17th in Greater London. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
A giant cat and a stuffed walrus.
Millwall fans are proud nobody likes them, and Catford's shopping centre seems to have taken the same attitude.
Catford's got a giant fibreglass cat on top of a shopping centre that's been due a makeover since before most of the shops shut. Forest Hill's got a walrus the Victorians stuffed till it went smooth, because nobody told them walruses have wrinkles. Lewisham town centre is cranes and a roundabout, and the roundabout's a nightmare.
Lewisham council logged 33,471 fly-tips in 2024-25, 8.6 times the typical council's rate, most of them dumped straight on the street. The ombudsman upheld 45 complaints against the council the year after. The air's got more than twice the typical town's nitrogen dioxide in it.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Lewisham's 99 for fly-tipping means it's crapper than 99% of towns.
- Fly-tipping99/10094.7 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Lewisham council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Air pollution98/10017.8 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 9.0 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Serious road collisions90/1004.0 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Anti-social behaviour85/10023.4 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Food hygiene81/1004.0% rated 0 to 2, of the 1,616 food businesses with a rating
- Broadband61/1009.9% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 9.9% across the Lewisham council area
- Criminal damage and arson46/1006.7 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Deliberate fires25/100
- Sewage spills10/1008.5 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Rain5/100110 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 13 | Southwark | 89 |
| 14 | Hammersmith and Fulham | 89 |
| 15 | Hounslow | 89 |
| 16 | Enfield | 88 |
| 17 | Lewisham | 87 |
| 18 | Greenwich | 85 |
| 19 | Islington | 84 |
| 20 | Wandsworth | 84 |
| 21 | Barnet | 83 |
Lewisham by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 97.9 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Worse: 28% higher than the typical town's 76.2
- 1,392 reports of fly-tipping on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 46.3 per 10,000 people, 42.1x the typical town's 1.1
- 11 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2026
What's left on the high street
- 81 pubs, 186 hairdressers, 28 charity shops, 31 bookmakers, 5 vape shops, 12 banks, 6 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 5.9% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (19 of 325) Worse: 48% higher than the typical town's 4.0%
- 4 bank branch closures announced since 2022 Better: 1.3 per 100,000 people, 62% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 67 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 2.2 per 10,000 people, 38% higher than the typical town's 1.6
- 8 public swimming pools open; 5 closed for good since 2010 Worse: 0.3 per 10,000 people, 57% lower than the typical English town's 0.7
- 14 places on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.51am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 1.0% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 2x the typical town's 0.5%
- 10.3% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 34% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,550 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Lewisham council
Have a crap-off
Lewisham against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.