Crap Towns / Lincolnshire / Grimsby
Grimsby
88/100Crap Score
116th crappest of 984 towns, and 2nd in Lincolnshire. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Fish town. Hardly any fish.
A fishing port with hardly any fishing. The football club plays in Cleethorpes.
Grimsby. The name does the review for us. The fishing fleet's mostly gone, the regeneration sites are still empty and even the football club plays in Cleethorpes. They're called Codheads and they eat haddock. Make of that what you will.
Crime is running at twice the typical town's rate, the vandalism at nearly three times, and serious crashes at nearly two and a half. 8 places are officially at risk, 5 of them whole conservation areas, so the old town's going the same way as the fleet. Only Boston's crapper in Lincolnshire. Scunthorpe will still tell you Grimsby's worse.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Grimsby's 98 for criminal damage and arson means it's crapper than 98% of towns.
- Criminal damage and arson98/10019.5 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Serious road collisions98/1005.7 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Deliberate fires95/10033.6 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Food hygiene86/1004.7% rated 0 to 2, of the 509 food businesses with a rating
- Anti-social behaviour78/10013.9 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Air pollution68/1008.0 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 7.4 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Fly-tipping65/10013.8 incidents per 1,000 people a year, North East Lincolnshire council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Rain24/100119 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Broadband16/1002.8% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 5.8% across the North East Lincolnshire council area
- Sewage spills14/10017.9 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Boston | 94 |
| 2 | Grimsby | 88 |
| 3 | Gainsborough | 87 |
| 4 | Lincoln | 81 |
| 5 | Skegness | 80 |
| 6 | Scunthorpe | 73 |
| 7 | Louth | 69 |
| 8 | Cleethorpes | 68 |
| 9 | Spalding | 64 |
Grimsby by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 156 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Worse: 2x the typical town's 76.2
- 1 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 0.1 per 10,000 people, 97% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 6 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2026
- Good Cleethorpes's bathing water rating, 2025
What's left on the high street
- 46 pubs, 41 hairdressers, 15 charity shops, 9 bookmakers, 6 vape shops, 10 banks, 3 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 10.0% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (8 of 80) Worse: 2.5x the typical town's 4.0%
- 1 bank branch closure announced since 2022 Better: 1.2 per 100,000 people, 65% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 1 library shut for good since 2010: Grant Thorold Library
- 11 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Worse: 1.3 per 10,000 people, 19% lower than the typical town's 1.6
- 6 public swimming pools open; 1 closed for good since 2010 About the same: 0.7 per 10,000 people, about the same as the typical English town's 0.7
- 8 places on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.14am last bus out on a Wednesday About the same: About the same as the typical town's 12.14am
- 1.0% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 2x the typical town's 0.5%
- 38.6% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 2.5x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,598 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
North East Lincolnshire council
- £2,484 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £92 more than the English average
- 22% of North East Lincolnshire council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Worse: 38% higher than England's 16%
- 10 ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Grimsby against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.