Crap Towns / Tyne and Wear / Gateshead
Gateshead
90/100Crap Score
Known as the Heed.
96th crappest of 984 towns, and 5th in Tyne and Wear. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
Got something to say about Gateshead? Write in.
agree it's crap have defended it
Lovely Angel. Shit town centre.
The Angel of the North waves you in. Then you see the rest of Gateshead.
Gateshead? The Angel's nice. The bridge is nice. Saltwell Park is nice. And all of them point you at Newcastle. The rest is yobs, vandals and fly-tipping, plus a flyover they've been knocking down forever. Somebody's started calling the riverside the Gateshead Riviera. It's Gateshead, lads. We can see it.
There's 22 bookies and 10 Greggs. Barclays has shut 2 branches and Halifax and Lloyds 1 each, 5 swimming pools have gone since 2010, and the bins go up in flames at over twelve times the typical town's rate. The council still wants £2,716 for a Band D. Newcastle gets the credit. Gateshead gets the shite.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Gateshead's 96 for deliberate fires means it's crapper than 96% of towns.
- Deliberate fires96/10034.7 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Criminal damage and arson93/10012.0 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Fly-tipping90/10027.0 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Gateshead council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Anti-social behaviour84/10023.1 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Sewage spills80/100884 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Serious road collisions67/1002.9 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Air pollution61/10011.8 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.3 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Broadband54/1007.9% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 10.6% across the Gateshead council area
- Rain47/100126 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Food hygiene7/1001.2% rated 0 to 2, of the 671 food businesses with a rating
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Newcastle upon Tyne | 99 |
| 2 | Wallsend | 97 |
| 3 | South Shields | 94 |
| 4 | Blaydon | 92 |
| 5 | Gateshead | 90 |
| 6 | Tynemouth | 89 |
| 7 | Sunderland | 87 |
| 8 | Jarrow | 82 |
| 9 | Hebburn | 75 |
Gateshead by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 104 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Worse: 36% higher than the typical town's 76.2
- 7 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 0.6 per 10,000 people, 82% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 12 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2025
What's left on the high street
- 80 pubs, 94 hairdressers, 19 charity shops, 22 bookmakers, 3 vape shops, 5 banks, 10 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 1.8% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (2 of 109) Better: 55% lower than the typical town's 4.0%
- 4 bank branch closures announced since 2022 About the same: 3.5 per 100,000 people, about the same as the typical town's 3.4
- 26 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 2.3 per 10,000 people, 44% higher than the typical town's 1.6
- 9 public swimming pools open; 5 closed for good since 2010 Better: 0.8 per 10,000 people, 14% higher than the typical English town's 0.7
- 2 places on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.39am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 1.9% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 3.8x the typical town's 0.5%
- 10.2% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 34% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,500 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Gateshead council
Have a crap-off
Gateshead against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.