Crap Towns / County Durham / Crook
Crook
80/100Crap Score
Locals are Crookites.
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 80. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
Got something to say about Crook? Write in.
agree it's crap have defended it
Ask anyone. They've never heard of it.
Market town on the way to Weardale. Most people take the hint and keep going.
Crook calls itself the Gateway to Weardale, which is a polite way of saying the nice bit's further on. The town centre is bookies, charity shops, Greggs and pubs, with loud music and smashed windows thrown in. And nobody can agree whether it rhymes with book or spook.
Some knobhead's smashing things at two and a half times the typical town's rate and setting fire to things at over eight times, mostly bins. There's 3 bookies, 13 pubs and no swimming pool since the last one shut. The air up here's lovely and clean, so at least you get a good view of the smoke.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Crook's 98 for criminal damage and arson means it's crapper than 98% of towns.
- Criminal damage and arson98/10017.9 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Deliberate fires97/10048.8 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Anti-social behaviour92/10028.6 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Sewage spills91/1001,625 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Broadband82/10015.2% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 14.6% across the County Durham council area
- Rain66/100138 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Fly-tipping56/10010.5 incidents per 1,000 people a year, County Durham council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Food hygiene40/1001.7% rated 0 to 2, of the 59 food businesses with a rating
- Serious road collisions18/1001.4 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Air pollution7/1004.0 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 5.2 of fine particles, 2024 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Bishop Auckland | 95 |
| 2 | Stanley | 88 |
| 3 | Darlington | 80 |
| – | Crook | 80 |
| 4 | Hartlepool | 79 |
| 5 | Chester-le-Street | 77 |
| 6 | Spennymoor | 74 |
| 7 | Stockton-on-Tees | 73 |
| 8 | Peterlee | 71 |
Crook by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 101 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Worse: 33% higher than the typical town's 76.2
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2016
What's left on the high street
- 13 pubs, 10 hairdressers, 4 charity shops, 3 bookmakers, 1 bank, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 0.0% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (0 of 12) Better: Against the typical town's 4.0%
- 1 bank branch closure announced since 2022 Worse: 10.3 per 100,000 people, 3x the typical town's 3.4
- 1 public toilet on the map (October 2026) Worse: 1.0 per 10,000 people, 38% lower than the typical town's 1.6
- None public swimming pools open; 1 closed for good since 2010 Worse: Against the typical English town's 0.7 per 10,000 people
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.04am last bus out on a Wednesday About the same: About the same as the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.2% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: 60% lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 30.2% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 1.9x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,497 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
County Durham council
Have a crap-off
Crook against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.