Crap Towns / Oxfordshire / Witney
Witney
20/100Crap Score
792nd crappest of 984 towns, and 3rd in Oxfordshire. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
The Windrush, and what's in it.
Old blanket town on the Windrush, with no railway station and a river with shit in it.
Witney made blankets for the country and has the old mills to prove it. There's the River Windrush, a Buttercross in the market square, charity shops and 28 pubs, nearly twice the typical town's per head. What there isn't is a railway station, so everyone sits on the road into Oxford every morning.
The storm overflows round the town spilled for 2.3 times as long as the typical town's, so the Windrush isn't as nice as it looks. The new houses keep coming and the kids have nothing to do, which is odd, because nearly everyone lives round the corner from a park.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Witney's 70 for sewage spills means it's crapper than 70% of towns.
- Sewage spills70/100617 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Deliberate fires55/1006.1 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Anti-social behaviour50/10010.3 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Broadband40/1006.6% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 7.4% across the West Oxfordshire council area
- Fly-tipping40/1009.5 incidents per 1,000 people a year, West Oxfordshire council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Air pollution33/1006.1 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.7 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Rain31/100121 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Criminal damage and arson29/1005.5 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Serious road collisions12/1001.4 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Food hygiene5/1000.6% rated 0 to 2, of the 181 food businesses with a rating
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Oxford | 62 |
| 2 | Banbury | 48 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.3 | Witney | 20 |
| 4 | Abingdon-on-Thames | 15 |
| 5 | Didcot | 13 |
| 6 | Bicester | 12 |
| 7 | Henley-on-Thames | 7 |
| 8 | Carterton | 5 |
| 9 | Wantage | 5 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Witney by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 60.3 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 21% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 973 reports of broken street lights on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 323 per 10,000 people, 461.4x the typical town's 0.7
- 10 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2024
What's left on the high street
- 28 pubs, 23 hairdressers, 12 charity shops, 3 bookmakers, 3 vape shops, 7 banks, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 0.0% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (0 of 26) Better: Against the typical town's 4.0%
- 1 bank branch closure announced since 2022 About the same: 3.3 per 100,000 people, about the same as the typical town's 3.4
- 5 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 1.7 per 10,000 people, 6% higher than the typical town's 1.6
- 3 public swimming pools open Better: 1.0 per 10,000 people, 43% higher than the typical English town's 0.7
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 1.13am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.2% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: 60% lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 4.1% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 74% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,644 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Better: 7% higher than the typical town's 1,532
West Oxfordshire council
- £2,567 Band D council tax (2026-27) Worse: £175 more than the English average
- 20% of Oxfordshire County Council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Worse: 25% higher than England's 16%
- 1 ombudsman complaint upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Witney against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.