Crap Towns / Gloucestershire / Moreton-in-Marsh
Moreton-in-Marsh
35/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 35. Higher scores are crapper.
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Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
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Letters from the locals
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Coach party coming through
A pretty market town with the Fosse Way jammed through the middle and tourists all over the pavement.
Moreton-in-Marsh is a pretty Cotswold town with a Tuesday market and a station full of tourists. The Fosse Way runs straight through the middle and it's jammed most days. Nowhere to park and coach parties clogging the High Street.
There are seven times the typical town's charity shops per head, so the coach parties have somewhere to go. The storm overflows spill for nearly 13 times as long per head as the typical town's. Nobody vandalises anything and there's not one deliberate fire on the books, mind. It's the Cotswolds.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Moreton-in-Marsh's 98 for sewage spills means it's crapper than 98% of towns.
- Sewage spills98/1003,543 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Broadband75/1005.0% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 27.8% across the Cotswold council area
- Fly-tipping58/10011.0 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Cotswold council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Rain41/100124 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Serious road collisions38/1002.0 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Anti-social behaviour37/10013.1 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Food hygiene22/1000.0% rated 0 to 2, of the 45 food businesses with a rating
- Air pollution18/1004.0 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.2 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Criminal damage and arson7/1003.7 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Deliberate fires0/100None, April 2023 to March 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 6 | Kingswood and Fishponds | 39 |
| 7 | Tewkesbury | 38 |
| 8 | Quedgeley and Hardwicke | 37 |
| 9 | Cirencester | 36 |
| – | Moreton-in-Marsh | 35 |
| 10 | Brockworth | 31 |
| 11 | Yate | 31 |
| 12 | Stoke Gifford | 30 |
| 13 | Churchdown | 24 |
Moreton-in-Marsh by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 54.5 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 28% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 326 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 651 per 10,000 people, 191.5x the typical town's 3.4
What's left on the high street
- 2 pubs, 4 hairdressers, 5 charity shops on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 1 bank branch closure announced since 2022 Worse: 20.0 per 100,000 people, 5.9x the typical town's 3.4
- 1 public toilet on the map (October 2026) Better: 2.0 per 10,000 people, 25% higher than the typical town's 1.6
- None public swimming pools open Worse: Against the typical English town's 0.7 per 10,000 people
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 9.45pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 2.2% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 4.4x the typical town's 0.5%
- 0.0% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: Against the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,542 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Cotswold council
- £2,392 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: The same as the English average
- 26% of Gloucestershire County Council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Worse: 1.6x England's 16%
- 1 ombudsman complaint upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Moreton-in-Marsh against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.