Crap Towns / South Yorkshire / Moorends
Moorends
51/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 51. Higher scores are crapper.
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Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
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Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Moorends. Flat. Very flat.
Built for the pit. The pit's gone. The vandals turned up.
Moorends was built for Thorne Colliery, on land so flat you can see next week. The pit's gone. Now the vandals have the run of the place and the local yobs keep fly-tipping round the edges. The moors are nice, if you're into peat. Locals don't moan much. Probably because nobody listens.
12% of the food places score 0 to 2, five times the typical town's share. There's no public park on the map and barely a play space, so the kids get Thorne Moors, which is a peat bog. Crude sewage went in the water in 2023, and it was the major kind. Gigabit broadband reaches nearly every house, mind. Something round here works.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Moorends's 83 for food hygiene means it's crapper than 83% of towns.
- Food hygiene83/10012.0% rated 0 to 2, of the 25 food businesses with a rating
- Serious road collisions81/1003.9 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Deliberate fires80/10014.9 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Criminal damage and arson79/1009.8 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Air pollution47/1006.8 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 7.0 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Sewage spills42/100201 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Fly-tipping31/1008.0 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Doncaster council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Anti-social behaviour26/10011.3 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Rain21/100118 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Broadband0/1000.3% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 3.6% across the Doncaster council area
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 18 | Warmsworth | 70 |
| 19 | Maltby | 65 |
| 20 | Swinton | 61 |
| 21 | Scawthorpe and Cusworth | 57 |
| – | Moorends | 51 |
| 22 | Darton | 49 |
| 23 | New Rossington and Rossington | 45 |
| 24 | Thorne | 45 |
| 25 | Chapeltown and High Green | 41 |
Moorends by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 76.2 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 76.2
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2023
What's left on the high street
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.04am last bus out on a Wednesday About the same: About the same as the typical town's 12.14am
- Under 0.1% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: Far lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 48.8% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space, and OS maps no public park here Worse: 3.1x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,492 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Doncaster council
Have a crap-off
Moorends against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.