Crap Towns / Lancashire / Longton
Longton
25/100Crap Score
741st crappest of 984 towns, and 34th in Lancashire. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
Got something to say about Longton? Write in.
agree it's crap have defended it
Longton. Not much wrong. Some sewage.
A nature reserve, a marsh full of birdwatchers, and parents parked on the pavement.
Longton's the Lancashire one, not the Stoke one, and it's a lot nicer. The old clay pits are a nature reserve, the marsh is full of blokes with binoculars, and crime sits at about a third of the typical town's. The only moan is school-run parents parked on the pavement.
Then you try to get online. Nearly two thirds of premises can't get gigabit broadband, and 4.4% can't even get superfast, nearly nine times the typical town's share. Sewage goes in the water for seven times the typical town's hours. The ducks don't seem to mind.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Longton's 99 for broadband means it's crapper than 99% of towns.
- Broadband99/10065.0% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 11.6% across the South Ribble council area
- Sewage spills93/1001,938 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Rain78/100154 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Serious road collisions49/1002.4 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Anti-social behaviour32/10012.4 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Food hygiene17/1000.0% rated 0 to 2, of the 57 food businesses with a rating
- Air pollution17/1005.4 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 5.6 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Deliberate fires10/1002.1 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Fly-tipping5/1004.0 incidents per 1,000 people a year, South Ribble council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Criminal damage and arson2/1002.9 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 26 | Heysham | 63 |
| 27 | Barnoldswick | 63 |
| 28 | Poulton-le-Fylde | 61 |
| 29 | Ormskirk | 51 |
| 30 | Thornton | 48 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.31 | Lytham St Anne's | 39 |
| 32 | Euxton | 35 |
| 33 | Penwortham | 34 |
| 34 | Longton | 25 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Longton by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 25.4 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 67% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 1 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 0.9 per 10,000 people, 74% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2023
What's left on the high street
- 7 pubs, 3 hairdressers on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 2 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 1.8 per 10,000 people, 13% higher than the typical town's 1.6
- None public swimming pools open Worse: Against the typical English town's 0.7 per 10,000 people
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.56pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 4.4% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 8.8x the typical town's 0.5%
- 46.0% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space, and OS maps no public park here Worse: 3x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,452 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 5% lower than the typical town's 1,532
South Ribble council
Have a crap-off
Longton against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.