Crap Towns / Hampshire / Hedge End
Hedge End
4/100Crap Score
947th crappest of 984 towns, and 28th in Hampshire. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Hedge End. Retail park with houses.
Hedge End swapped its strawberry fields for retail parks. The traffic came with them.
Hedge End used to grow strawberries. Now it's retail parks, and every car in south Hampshire comes to them. The queues back up to the motorway and you can't walk between the shops without nearly getting run over. Hedge Enders live round the edge of it like staff at a theme park.
For a town built for a day out shopping, it's got 2 pubs. That's it. Barclays and Lloyds have shut up shop too, but you can still get a sofa on finance any day of the week. Otherwise there's hardly any crime and nothing gets smashed. Retail heaven.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Hedge End's 59 for air pollution means it's crapper than 59% of towns.
- Air pollution59/10010.5 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.5 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Broadband54/1008.4% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 9.7% across the Eastleigh council area
- Food hygiene47/1002.3% rated 0 to 2, of the 88 food businesses with a rating
- Rain44/100125 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Deliberate fires40/1005.2 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Sewage spills25/10063.0 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2024 to 2025
- Serious road collisions11/1001.3 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Fly-tipping11/1004.9 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Eastleigh council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Anti-social behaviour9/1007.9 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Criminal damage and arson8/1003.8 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 23 | West End | 10 |
| 24 | Locks Heath | 9 |
| 25 | Alton | 9 |
| 26 | Hythe and Dibden Purlieu | 6 |
| 27 | South Hayling | 5 |
| 28 | Hedge End | 4 |
| 29 | Horndean | 3 |
| 30 | Chandler's Ford | 3 |
| 31 | Lee-on-the-Solent | 0 |
Hedge End by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 54.8 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 28% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 46 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 19.8 per 10,000 people, 5.8x the typical town's 3.4
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2026
What's left on the high street
- 2 pubs, 7 hairdressers, 4 charity shops, 2 bookmakers, 2 vape shops, 3 banks, 2 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 10.0% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (1 of 10) Worse: 2.5x the typical town's 4.0%
- 2 bank branch closures announced since 2022 Worse: 8.6 per 100,000 people, 2.5x the typical town's 3.4
- 2 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Worse: 0.9 per 10,000 people, 44% lower than the typical town's 1.6
- 3 public swimming pools open Better: 1.3 per 10,000 people, 1.9x the typical English town's 0.7
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.23pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.6% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 20% higher than the typical town's 0.5%
- 11.4% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 26% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,678 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Better: 10% higher than the typical town's 1,532
Eastleigh council
- £2,342 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £50 less than the English average
- 8% of Hampshire County Council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 50% lower than England's 16%
- 1 ombudsman complaint upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Hedge End against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.