Crap Towns / Greater Manchester / Failsworth
Failsworth
81/100Crap Score
183rd crappest of 984 towns, and 32nd in Greater Manchester. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Have you seen the pole?
A famous pole, the Oldham Road and the bus to Manchester.
Failsworth's claim to fame is a pole. They've put it up, knocked it down and put it back up again over the years, and it's still the most interesting thing on the Oldham Road. Daisy Nook has a fair at Easter. Otherwise it's shuttered shops and the bus to Manchester.
There's hardly any green in the town itself. One public park, and more than half the place lives over 400 metres from a park or play space. The air's 1.7 times the typical town's for nitrogen dioxide, you get rain on 167 days a year and the sun shows its face for 1,327 hours. The broadband's great, mind, so you can stay in.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Failsworth's 92 for air pollution means it's crapper than 92% of towns.
- Air pollution92/10014.1 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 7.7 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Rain89/100167 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Fly-tipping86/10022.9 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Oldham council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Criminal damage and arson73/1008.8 per 1,000 people a year, July 2023 to June 2026
- Deliberate fires72/1009.9 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Sewage spills67/100554 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Anti-social behaviour61/10016.9 per 1,000 people a year, July 2023 to June 2026
- Food hygiene51/1002.5% rated 0 to 2, of the 119 food businesses with a rating
- Serious road collisions46/1002.3 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Broadband1/1001.2% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 2.8% across the Oldham council area
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 28 | Chadderton | 84 |
| 29 | Old Trafford | 83 |
| 30 | Irlam | 83 |
| 31 | Wythenshawe | 83 |
| 32 | Failsworth | 81 |
| 33 | Platt Bridge and Abram | 81 |
| 34 | Hindley | 81 |
| 35 | Radcliffe | 81 |
| 36 | Whitefield | 81 |
Failsworth by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 102 crimes per 1,000 people a year (July 2023 to June 2026) Worse: 34% higher than the typical town's 76.2
- 7 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 About the same: 3.5 per 10,000 people, about the same as the typical town's 3.4
- 5 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2020
What's left on the high street
- 15 pubs, 14 hairdressers, 2 bookmakers, 1 vape shop, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 0.0% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (0 of 32) Better: Against the typical town's 4.0%
- 3 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Worse: 1.5 per 10,000 people, 6% lower than the typical town's 1.6
- 1 public swimming pool open Worse: 0.5 per 10,000 people, 29% lower than the typical English town's 0.7
- 1 place on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 1.23am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.0% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: Against the typical town's 0.5%
- 53.4% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 3.4x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,327 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 13% lower than the typical town's 1,532
Oldham council
Have a crap-off
Failsworth against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.