Crap Towns / Gwent / Ebbw Vale
Ebbw Vale
96/100Crap Score
43rd crappest of 984 towns, and 4th in Gwent. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Ebbw Vale. Even the sheep look fed up.
The steelworks shut, the shopping centre shut and the sheep moved into the car park.
Ebbw Vale used to make steel. Now the shopping centre's shut, the multistorey's falling to bits and there are sheep wandering round it. It's bloody freezing, and the rain turns up on 169 days a year on top of that.
Criminal damage is running at nearly two and a half times the typical town's rate and anti-social behaviour at nearly twice, and both are going up. The kitchens fail inspections, and somehow the town's short of pubs, with 3 on the map, which in this weather is a scandal. On a Sunday there's barely a bus out. The sheep have the right idea. They stay in the car park.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Ebbw Vale's 98 for criminal damage and arson means it's crapper than 98% of towns.
- Criminal damage and arson98/10017.1 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Rain91/100169 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Anti-social behaviour90/10027.0 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Food hygiene90/1007.4% rated 0 to 2, of the 122 food businesses with a rating
- Sewage spills80/100904 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Broadband80/1009.9% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 22.4% across the Blaenau Gwent council area
- Fly-tipping72/10015.7 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Blaenau Gwent council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Serious road collisions51/1002.4 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Deliberate fires50/100
- Air pollution13/1005.6 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 5.1 of fine particles, 2024 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Tredegar | 98 |
| 2 | Newport | 97 |
| 3 | Risca | 96 |
| 4 | Ebbw Vale | 96 |
| 5 | Abertillery | 95 |
| 6 | Blackwood | 92 |
| 7 | Caerphilly | 88 |
| 8 | Pontypool | 86 |
| 9 | Ystrad Mynach | 85 |
Ebbw Vale by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 115 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Worse: 1.5x the typical town's 76.2
- 14 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 7.1 per 10,000 people, 2.1x the typical town's 3.4
What's left on the high street
- 3 pubs, 7 hairdressers, 3 charity shops, 2 bookmakers, 1 vape shop, 2 banks, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 9.1% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (2 of 22) Worse: 2.3x the typical town's 4.0%
- 2 bank branch closures announced since 2022 Worse: 10.2 per 100,000 people, 3x the typical town's 3.4
- 2 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Worse: 1.0 per 10,000 people, 38% lower than the typical town's 1.6
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.22pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.7% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 40% higher than the typical town's 0.5%
- 5.5% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 65% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,388 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 9% lower than the typical town's 1,532
Blaenau Gwent council
Have a crap-off
Ebbw Vale against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.