Crap Towns / North Yorkshire / Thirsk
Thirsk
52/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 52. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Thirsk. Not as nice as on the telly.
The telly vet's town. Cars all over the cobbles, and the station's a hike away.
Thirsk is where the telly vet was, and it milks it. The cobbled Market Place is full of traffic and the paving's knackered. The station is a long walk out of town. It's got vape shops, bookies, charity shops and Greggs, and more anti-social behaviour than a little market town should.
The last bus is at 6.31pm, and they run about a sixteenth as often as the typical town's, so once you're here you're staying for the vet. Barclays and Lloyds have both gone. There's 12 pubs, 7 charity shops and 2 Greggs, which per head is about eleven times the typical town's. Darrowby on the telly never looked like this.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Thirsk's 86 for anti-social behaviour means it's crapper than 86% of towns.
- Anti-social behaviour86/10023.8 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Sewage spills84/1001,079 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Broadband72/1009.1% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 17.4% across the North Yorkshire council area
- Criminal damage and arson71/1008.7 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Food hygiene57/1003.2% rated 0 to 2, of the 62 food businesses with a rating
- Rain46/100126 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Deliberate fires39/1004.9 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Serious road collisions26/1001.6 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Air pollution18/1005.9 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 5.6 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Fly-tipping12/1005.0 incidents per 1,000 people a year, North Yorkshire council area, 2023-24 to 2024-25
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 7 | Redcar | 71 |
| 8 | Thornaby-on-Tees | 71 |
| 9 | Whitby | 64 |
| 10 | Northallerton | 56 |
| – | Thirsk | 52 |
| 11 | Selby | 51 |
| 12 | Huntington | 46 |
| 13 | Haxby | 40 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.14 | Catterick Garrison | 31 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Thirsk by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 63.4 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 17% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 2 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 About the same: 3.4 per 10,000 people, about the same as the typical town's 3.4
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2018
What's left on the high street
- 12 pubs, 8 hairdressers, 7 charity shops, 2 bookmakers, 1 vape shop, 2 banks, 2 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 2 bank branch closures announced since 2022 Worse: 34.0 per 100,000 people, 10x the typical town's 3.4
- 2 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 3.4 per 10,000 people, 2.1x the typical town's 1.6
- 2 public swimming pools open Better: 3.4 per 10,000 people, 4.9x the typical English town's 0.7
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 6.31pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 1.2% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 2.4x the typical town's 0.5%
- 0.0% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: Against the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,438 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 6% lower than the typical town's 1,532
North Yorkshire council
- £2,544 Band D council tax (2026-27) Worse: £152 more than the English average
- 18% of North Yorkshire council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Worse: 13% higher than England's 16%
- 41 ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Thirsk against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.