Crap Towns / Cumbria / Penrith
Penrith
25/100Crap Score
734th crappest of 984 towns, and 6th in Cumbria. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
Got something to say about Penrith? Write in.
agree it's crap have defended it
Penrith. Penerife, my arse.
Ruined castle by the station. Locals reckon it's hotter than the Lakes. It isn't.
Penrith calls itself Penerife, on the grounds that it's supposedly hotter than the Lakes. The sunshine adds up to 1,366 hours a year, a good bit less than the typical town, and it rains on 151 days. Some Tenerife.
The ruined castle is right by the station, which is handy, because the station is where anyone with any ambition ends up. Round the old yards it's charity shops, hairdressers, bookies and vape shops, more of each per head than most towns, and the banks have announced three branch closures since 2022. There are about a third of the typical town's buses after seven, so a night out in the Rith means a pub you can walk home from.
Withnail and I was set here, and they filmed the town scenes somewhere else.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Penrith's 75 for rain means it's crapper than 75% of towns.
- Rain75/100151 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Criminal damage and arson67/1008.3 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Sewage spills66/100509 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Broadband57/1004.8% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 18.2% across the Westmorland and Furness council area
- Deliberate fires40/1005.2 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Fly-tipping34/1008.3 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Westmorland and Furness council area, 2023-24 to 2024-25
- Anti-social behaviour29/1007.8 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Food hygiene24/1001.3% rated 0 to 2, of the 152 food businesses with a rating
- Serious road collisions19/1001.6 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Air pollution10/1005.2 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 5.0 of fine particles, 2024 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Whitehaven | 75 |
| 2 | Workington | 75 |
| 3 | Barrow-in-Furness | 65 |
| 4 | Carlisle | 62 |
| 5 | Ulverston | 40 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.6 | Penrith | 25 |
| 7 | Kendal | 20 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Penrith by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 91.2 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Worse: 20% higher than the typical town's 76.2
- 2 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 1.2 per 10,000 people, 65% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 7 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2026
What's left on the high street
- 20 pubs, 25 hairdressers, 14 charity shops, 4 bookmakers, 3 vape shops, 8 banks, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 0.0% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (0 of 16) Better: Against the typical town's 4.0%
- 3 bank branch closures announced since 2022 Worse: 18.0 per 100,000 people, 5.3x the typical town's 3.4
- 7 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 4.2 per 10,000 people, 2.6x the typical town's 1.6
- 3 public swimming pools open Better: 1.8 per 10,000 people, 2.6x the typical English town's 0.7
- 1 place on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.02am last bus out on a Wednesday About the same: About the same as the typical town's 12.14am
- 1.0% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 2x the typical town's 0.5%
- 19.8% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 28% higher than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,366 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 11% lower than the typical town's 1,532
Westmorland and Furness council
- £2,508 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £116 more than the English average
- 26% of Westmorland and Furness council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Worse: 1.6x England's 16%
- 8 ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Penrith against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.