Crap Towns / Cheshire / Northwich
Northwich
69/100Crap Score
307th crappest of 984 towns, and 2nd in Cheshire. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Half empty, half sunk
The town used to sink into the old salt mines. Now Barons Quay is sat there empty.
Northwich used to sink, literally, because of the salt mines underneath. Then the council built Barons Quay, a big new shopping centre, and it's mostly empty. Weaver Square isn't doing much better, and the old town centre is on the Heritage at Risk list. The High Street is hairdressers, vape shops and bookies, more of each per head than most towns, and Winnington Bridge is a queue.
The water company lets sewage out for more than five times as long as in the typical town, and the kitchens fail their hygiene inspections more than twice as often as the typical town's. On a Sunday the buses run at about a thirtieth of the typical town's, so even if you fancied Barons Quay, you'd struggle to get there. Lovely.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Northwich's 90 for sewage spills means it's crapper than 90% of towns.
- Sewage spills90/1001,489 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Food hygiene86/1005.8% rated 0 to 2, of the 156 food businesses with a rating
- Anti-social behaviour75/10013.2 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Rain72/100147 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Serious road collisions47/1002.3 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Criminal damage and arson43/1006.6 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Broadband40/1004.5% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 11.7% across the Cheshire West and Chester council area
- Air pollution38/1007.5 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.3 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Fly-tipping34/1008.3 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Cheshire West and Chester council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Deliberate fires30/1004.3 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Crewe | 70 |
| 2 | Northwich | 69 |
| 3 | Widnes | 63 |
| 4 | Winsford | 52 |
| 5 | Chester | 49 |
| 6 | Ellesmere Port | 49 |
| 7 | Warrington | 40 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.8 | Runcorn | 39 |
| 9 | Middlewich | 39 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Northwich by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 99.3 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Worse: 30% higher than the typical town's 76.2
- 3 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 1.6 per 10,000 people, 53% lower than the typical town's 3.4
- 4 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2025
What's left on the high street
- 12 pubs, 31 hairdressers, 9 charity shops, 5 bookmakers, 5 vape shops, 7 banks, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 9.1% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (3 of 33) Worse: 2.3x the typical town's 4.0%
- 1 bank branch closure announced since 2022 Worse: 5.4 per 100,000 people, 1.6x the typical town's 3.4
- 5 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 2.7 per 10,000 people, 1.7x the typical town's 1.6
- 3 public swimming pools open; 3 closed for good since 2010 Better: 1.6 per 10,000 people, 2.3x the typical English town's 0.7
- 1 place on England's Heritage at Risk register
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.12pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.1% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: 80% lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 2.8% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 82% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,466 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Cheshire West and Chester council
- £2,517 Band D council tax (2026-27) Worse: £125 more than the English average
- 6% of Cheshire West and Chester council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 63% lower than England's 16%
- 16 ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Northwich against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.