Crap Towns / North Ayrshire / Dalry
Dalry
29/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 29. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Dalry. It's raining in the glen.
A wee Garnock Valley town with rivers round it and the rain keeping them topped up.
Dalry's got rivers on three sides and rain on 190 days a year to keep them full: 1,542 mm of it, twice the typical town's. Otherwise it's mostly all right, which round here counts as showing off. The storm overflows hardly spill at all.
The parks are another matter. There's not much public park per head, so the weans play in Lynn Glen instead, where the old stories say there are fairies in the caves.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Dalry's 99 for rain means it's crapper than 99% of towns.
- Rain99/100190 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Food hygiene55/1006.5% told to improve, of the 31 food businesses inspected
- Fly-tipping50/100
- Broadband45/1003.0% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 16.3% across the North Ayrshire council area
- Serious road collisions41/1001.5 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Anti-social behaviour40/1007.1 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Deliberate fires38/10014.5 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Criminal damage and arson31/1005.7 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Sewage spills5/1000.3 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2025
- Air pollution0/1002.9 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 4.2 of fine particles, 2024 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Saltcoats | 87 |
| 2 | Irvine | 77 |
| 3 | Kilwinning | 58 |
| 4 | Largs | 46 |
| 5 | Ardrossan | 46 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.– | Dalry | 29 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Dalry by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
What's left on the high street
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.46pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- Under 0.1% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: Far lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 26.2% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 1.7x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,298 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 15% lower than the typical town's 1,532
North Ayrshire council
- £1,686 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £33 more than the Scottish average
- 31% of North Ayrshire council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 14% lower than Scotland's 36%
- 50 ombudsman complaints decided in 2025-26, none upheld Worse: 37.4 per 100,000 residents, 8% higher than Scotland's 34.7
- 89.6% of the streets checked passed as clean (2025-26) About the same: About the same as Scotland's 92.2%
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Dalry against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.