Crap Towns / Staffordshire / Burntwood
Burntwood
6/100Crap Score
924th crappest of 984 towns, and 16th in Staffordshire. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Lichfield gets everything. We get this.
Its big claim is the smallest park in England. That tells you most of what you need.
Burntwood is proudest of having the smallest park in England. You can walk round it before your tea goes cold, and they hold a fun run in it, which doesn't take long. Chasewater's nice, crime's low, and the main hobby is moaning that Lichfield gets all the attention while the town centre shrinks.
Play spaces per head are under half the typical town's, so the kids are doing laps of the tiny park as well. 6 of the 109 food places with a rating score 0 to 2, more than twice the typical town's share. Count up the shops on the map and you get 14 pubs and 2 bookies. That's the town centre.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Burntwood's 81 for food hygiene means it's crapper than 81% of towns.
- Food hygiene81/1005.5% rated 0 to 2, of the 109 food businesses with a rating
- Air pollution68/1009.1 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 7.2 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Rain58/100132 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Broadband40/1001.9% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 16.8% across the Lichfield council area
- Deliberate fires36/1004.9 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Sewage spills19/10037.0 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Anti-social behaviour11/1008.5 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Fly-tipping10/1003.8 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Lichfield council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Criminal damage and arson7/1003.7 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Serious road collisions0/1000.5 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 10 | Wombourne | 17 |
| 11 | Uttoxeter | 16 |
| 12 | Tamworth | 15 |
| 13 | Cheadle | 14 |
| 14 | Stone | 13 |
| 15 | Lichfield | 10 |
| 16 | Burntwood | 6 |
| 17 | Cannock | 4 |
| 18 | Rugeley | 2 |
Burntwood by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 55.2 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 28% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 41 reports of fly-tipping on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 14.7 per 10,000 people, 13.4x the typical town's 1.1
What's left on the high street
- 14 pubs, 2 bookmakers on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 5.0% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (1 of 20) Worse: 25% higher than the typical town's 4.0%
- 3 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Worse: 1.1 per 10,000 people, 31% lower than the typical town's 1.6
- 3 public swimming pools open Better: 1.1 per 10,000 people, 1.6x the typical English town's 0.7
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.38pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.1% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: 80% lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 21.2% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 37% higher than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,462 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Lichfield council
- £2,352 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £40 less than the English average
- 10% of Staffordshire County Council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 38% lower than England's 16%
- 1 ombudsman complaint upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Burntwood against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.