Crap Towns / Midlothian / Gorebridge
Gorebridge
42/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 42. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Gorebridge. Built on the bing.
Old pit village with a bing for a viewpoint, a railway station and new houses arriving faster than the schools.
Gorebridge's best view is from the top of the old pit bing, which tells you most of what you need to know. Now the railway's back and the house builders have found it, so the estates keep coming and the school and the surgery stay the size they were. The locals moan about broken glass all over the streets.
The sewage is the real problem. Storm overflows near Gorebridge spilled for nearly five times the typical town's hours, and the kitchens get pulled up twice as often as the typical Scottish town's. The Sunday buses run at nearly four times the typical town's rate. Getting out's never been easier.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Gorebridge's 87 for sewage spills means it's crapper than 87% of towns.
- Sewage spills87/1001,293 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Food hygiene79/10011.8% told to improve, of the 34 food businesses inspected
- Rain70/100146 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Deliberate fires55/10023.6 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Fly-tipping50/100
- Criminal damage and arson48/1006.9 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Anti-social behaviour28/1006.4 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Broadband22/1003.1% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 7.5% across the Midlothian council area
- Serious road collisions21/1001.1 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Air pollution2/1003.6 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 4.5 of fine particles, 2024 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Dalkeith | 81 |
| 2 | Mayfield | 44 |
| – | Gorebridge | 42 |
| 3 | Penicuik | 40 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.4 | Bonnyrigg | 34 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Gorebridge by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 38.9 crimes per 1,000 people a year (January 2023 to December 2025) Better: 28% lower than the typical Scottish town's 54.4
- 1 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 1.1 per 10,000 people, 80% lower than the typical Scottish town's 5.6
What's left on the high street
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.23am last bus out on a Wednesday About the same: About the same as the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.7% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 40% higher than the typical town's 0.5%
- 0.0% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: Against the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,320 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 14% lower than the typical town's 1,532
Midlothian council
- £1,816 Band D council tax (2026-27) Worse: £163 more than the Scottish average
- 37% of Midlothian council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) About the same: About the same as Scotland's 36%
- 61 ombudsman complaints decided in 2025-26, 2 upheld Worse: 63.2 per 100,000 residents, 1.8x Scotland's 34.7
- 91.7% of the streets checked passed as clean (2025-26) About the same: About the same as Scotland's 92.2%
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Gorebridge against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.