Crap Towns / West Sussex / East Wittering
East Wittering
4/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 4. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
The other Wittering.
Nice beach, charity shops and everyone else's car across your drive.
East Wittering's too nice to properly slag off. Decent beach, decent surf, nothing much gets smashed up. The trouble's summer. Everyone heading for West Wittering dumps their car here, across drives, on verges, on pavements, then the Chichester road jams solid.
There's 1 pub and over three and a half times the typical town's charity shops per head, so it's a cracking place to buy a second-hand wetsuit and nowhere to have a drink after. Nobody's set a single deliberate fire. Both bathing waters were rated Excellent. Insufferable.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
East Wittering's 88 for broadband means it's crapper than 88% of towns.
- Broadband88/10010.4% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 32.7% across the Chichester council area
- Food hygiene42/1001.9% rated 0 to 2, of the 52 food businesses with a rating
- Serious road collisions28/1001.7 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Anti-social behaviour27/10011.5 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Fly-tipping23/1006.9 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Chichester council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Rain20/100117 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Deliberate fires15/100
- Air pollution15/1005.0 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 5.5 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Criminal damage and arson10/1004.1 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Sewage spills2/1000.0 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 11 | Haywards Heath | 37 |
| 12 | Burgess Hill | 36 |
| 13 | Horsham | 34 |
| 14 | Lancing and Sompting | 30 |
| 15 | Hassocks and Hurstpierpoint | 26 |
| 16 | Selsey | 16 |
| 17 | Rustington | 15 |
| 18 | Southwater | 7 |
| – | East Wittering | 4 |
East Wittering by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 39.2 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 49% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 8 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 13.2 per 10,000 people, 3.9x the typical town's 3.4
- 1 serious pollution incident within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2021
- 2 of 2 bathing waters here or within 2 km rated Excellent in 2025
What's left on the high street
- 1 pub, 4 hairdressers, 3 charity shops on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 3 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 5.0 per 10,000 people, 3.1x the typical town's 1.6
- 1 public swimming pool open Better: 1.7 per 10,000 people, 2.4x the typical English town's 0.7
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.52pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- Under 0.1% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: Far lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 29.8% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 1.9x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,799 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Better: 17% higher than the typical town's 1,532
Chichester council
- £2,470 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £78 more than the English average
- 19% of West Sussex County Council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Worse: 19% higher than England's 16%
- None ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
East Wittering against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.