Crap Towns / Shropshire / Albrighton
Albrighton
2/100Crap Score
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 2. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Albrighton. Can't even slag it off.
No crime, no fly-tipping, nice trees. The only noise is the planes at Cosford.
We went looking for something shit in Albrighton and came back with nothing. No vandals, no fly-tipping, hardly a crash in five years, lime trees down the High Street. The loudest thing for miles is the planes at Cosford. The only time anyone gets angry is when someone wants to build houses on a field. That's it. That's the drama.
The one catch is getting out of it. On a Wednesday the last bus is at 6.05pm and nothing at all runs on a Sunday, so a night out in Wolverhampton means a taxi home or a very long walk. Nobody seems that bothered. For a village this pleased with its trees, there's no public park on the map either. They've got a field. They're keeping it.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Albrighton's 80 for broadband means it's crapper than 80% of towns.
- Broadband80/1008.5% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 25.4% across the Shropshire council area
- Food hygiene56/1003.9% rated 0 to 2, of the 26 food businesses with a rating
- Rain54/100130 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Sewage spills45/100224 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Air pollution22/1005.5 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.1 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Deliberate fires9/1001.8 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Fly-tipping9/1004.3 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Shropshire council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Serious road collisions1/1000.3 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Anti-social behaviour0/1003.4 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Criminal damage and arson0/1001.7 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Telford | 59 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.2 | Shrewsbury | 39 |
| 3 | Newport | 29 |
| 4 | Oswestry | 28 |
| 5 | Bridgnorth | 23 |
| 6 | Ludlow | 19 |
| 7 | Market Drayton | 8 |
| – | Albrighton | 2 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Albrighton by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 27.0 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 65% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 144 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 206 per 10,000 people, 60.6x the typical town's 3.4
What's left on the high street
- 5 pubs, 7 hairdressers on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 2 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 2.9 per 10,000 people, 1.8x the typical town's 1.6
- 2 public swimming pools open; 1 closed for good since 2010 Better: 2.9 per 10,000 people, 4.1x the typical English town's 0.7
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 6.05pm last bus out on a Wednesday, and none on a Sunday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 3.3% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 6.6x the typical town's 0.5%
- 48.2% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space, and OS maps no public park here Worse: 3.1x the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,465 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Shropshire council
Have a crap-off
Albrighton against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.