Crap Towns / West Lothian / Whitburn
Whitburn
68/100Crap Score
318th crappest of 984 towns, and 2nd in West Lothian. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Whitburn. Something's always on fire.
An old pit town on the M8, where the brass band plays on and a wheelie bin goes up most weeks.
Whitburn was a pit town till Polkemmet shut, and it's had the M8 going past ever since without stopping. The Main Street lost its shops, the old buildings came down for worse ones, and the vape shops moved in, eight times as thick on the ground as in the typical town. The brass band's still good. That's about all that is.
Whitburn burns things. Deliberate fires run at 4.7 times the typical Scottish town's rate, and bins and rubbish get it more than seven times as often. With 173 wet days a year, that takes real commitment. In the West Lothian table only Bathgate's crapper.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Whitburn's 99 for deliberate fires means it's crapper than 99% of towns.
- Deliberate fires99/100104 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Rain95/100173 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Criminal damage and arson86/10010.7 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Anti-social behaviour63/1009.7 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Serious road collisions60/1001.9 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Fly-tipping50/100
- Sewage spills45/100223 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2025
- Food hygiene43/1004.4% told to improve, of the 46 food businesses inspected
- Broadband41/1006.5% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 7.7% across the West Lothian council area
- Air pollution8/1005.3 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 4.6 of fine particles, 2024 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Bathgate | 77 |
| 2 | Whitburn | 68 |
| 3 | Armadale | 58 |
| 4 | Livingston | 40 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.5 | Broxburn | 30 |
| 6 | Linlithgow | 20 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Whitburn by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 64.1 crimes per 1,000 people a year (January 2023 to December 2025) Worse: 18% higher than the typical Scottish town's 54.4
- 38 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 32.3 per 10,000 people, 5.8x the typical Scottish town's 5.6
What's left on the high street
- 2 pubs, 9 hairdressers, 1 charity shop, 3 bookmakers, 3 vape shops, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 9.1% of takeaways inspected told to improve (1 of 11) About the same: About the same as the typical Scottish town's 9.1%
- 1 public toilet on the map (October 2026) Worse: 0.8 per 10,000 people, 50% lower than the typical town's 1.6
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.40am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.4% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: 20% lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 3.3% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 79% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,298 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 15% lower than the typical town's 1,532
West Lothian council
- £1,628 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £25 less than the Scottish average
- 31% of West Lothian council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 14% lower than Scotland's 36%
- 78 ombudsman complaints decided in 2025-26, none upheld Worse: 43.0 per 100,000 residents, 24% higher than Scotland's 34.7
- 88.4% of the streets checked passed as clean (2025-26) About the same: About the same as Scotland's 92.2%
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Whitburn against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.