Crap Towns / West Lothian / Armadale
Armadale
58/100Crap Score
Known as the Dale.
413th crappest of 984 towns, and 3rd in West Lothian. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
The Dale. Wet, and nowhere to dry off.
An old mining town with a shut swimming pool, a brickworks row that never ends and a lot of rain.
Armadale dug coal and fireclay and made bricks, and the old brickworks and quarry have been a fight ever since they stopped. The swimming pool's shut and the town's still arguing over it. For a town this size there's hardly anywhere for a pint and 1 hairdresser, so it's a short night out and a long fringe.
Rain comes down on 168 days a year. The storm overflows spill at more than four times the typical town's rate, and the grass goes up whenever it's dry enough, which isn't often. The Dale had speedway and greyhounds once. Now it has puddles.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Armadale's 91 for rain means it's crapper than 91% of towns.
- Rain91/100168 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Sewage spills86/1001,195 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Deliberate fires73/10032.8 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Food hygiene62/100
- Criminal damage and arson62/1008.0 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Fly-tipping50/100
- Anti-social behaviour43/1007.4 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Broadband43/1007.0% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 7.7% across the West Lothian council area
- Serious road collisions28/1001.3 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Air pollution10/1005.3 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 4.9 of fine particles, 2024 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Bathgate | 77 |
| 2 | Whitburn | 68 |
| 3 | Armadale | 58 |
| 4 | Livingston | 40 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.5 | Broxburn | 30 |
| 6 | Linlithgow | 20 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Armadale by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 47.8 crimes per 1,000 people a year (January 2023 to December 2025) Better: 12% lower than the typical Scottish town's 54.4
- 18 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 14.3 per 10,000 people, 2.6x the typical Scottish town's 5.6
What's left on the high street
- 2 pubs, 1 hairdresser on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 1 public toilet on the map (October 2026) Worse: 0.8 per 10,000 people, 50% lower than the typical town's 1.6
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.31am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- Under 0.1% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: Far lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 3.3% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 79% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,319 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Worse: 14% lower than the typical town's 1,532
West Lothian council
- £1,628 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £25 less than the Scottish average
- 31% of West Lothian council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 14% lower than Scotland's 36%
- 78 ombudsman complaints decided in 2025-26, none upheld Worse: 43.0 per 100,000 residents, 24% higher than Scotland's 34.7
- 88.4% of the streets checked passed as clean (2025-26) About the same: About the same as Scotland's 92.2%
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Armadale against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.