Crap Towns / East Lothian / North Berwick
North Berwick
4/100Crap Score
Known as NB, or Morningside-sur-Mer.
Too small for the table, which starts at 10,000 people, but it still scores 4. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
North Berwick. Terribly nice.
Gannets on the Bass Rock, golf on the links and house prices that have pushed the locals inland.
North Berwick is Morningside-sur-Mer, the bit of Edinburgh that moved to the seaside and brought its manners. There's the Bass Rock, white with gannets and the smell coming off it, the Law with its fake whalebone arch on top, the golf links and the Fringe by the Sea every August. The houses are holiday lets or cost a fortune, so the people who work in the cafés come in on the bus.
Crime runs at well under half the typical Scottish town's, and robbery barely registers. The worst it gets is the gulls. There's a charity shop on every corner, and the stock's better dressed than you are.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
North Berwick's 79 for broadband means it's crapper than 79% of towns.
- Broadband79/10014.8% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 12.2% across the East Lothian council area
- Fly-tipping50/100
- Sewage spills42/100198 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2025
- Rain39/100124 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Food hygiene25/1002.8% told to improve, of the 71 food businesses inspected
- Anti-social behaviour9/1003.3 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Serious road collisions7/1000.7 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Deliberate fires3/1003.7 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Criminal damage and arson2/1002.8 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Air pollution0/1002.5 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 4.1 of fine particles, 2024 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Musselburgh | 74 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.2 | Haddington | 27 |
| 3 | Tranent | 20 |
| 4 | Prestonpans | 18 |
| 5 | Dunbar | 13 |
| – | North Berwick | 4 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
North Berwick by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 20.4 crimes per 1,000 people a year (January 2023 to December 2025) Better: 63% lower than the typical Scottish town's 54.4
- 3 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 3.6 per 10,000 people, 36% lower than the typical Scottish town's 5.6
- 0 of 4 bathing waters here or within 2 km rated Excellent in 2025
What's left on the high street
- 4 pubs, 2 hairdressers, 5 charity shops, 3 banks, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 1 bank branch closure announced since 2022 Worse: 12.0 per 100,000 people, 3.5x the typical town's 3.4
- 3 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 3.6 per 10,000 people, 2.3x the typical town's 1.6
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 1.12am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.3% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: 40% lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 6.4% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 59% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,495 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
East Lothian council
- £1,698 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £45 more than the Scottish average
- 34% of East Lothian council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 6% lower than Scotland's 36%
- 38 ombudsman complaints decided in 2025-26, 1 upheld About the same: 33.8 per 100,000 residents, about the same as Scotland's 34.7
- 91.0% of the streets checked passed as clean (2025-26) About the same: About the same as Scotland's 92.2%
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
North Berwick against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.