Crap Towns / East Lothian / Prestonpans
Prestonpans
18/100Crap Score
Known as the Pans. Locals are Panners.
809th crappest of 984 towns, and 4th in East Lothian. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
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agree it's crap have defended it
Prestonpans. Nice murals, mind.
Salt pans, pits, a pottery and a famous battle. All of it's painted on the walls now.
Prestonpans made salt, dug coal and fired pottery, and won a battle in 1745 that people still argue about. All of it is now painted on gable ends round the town, which calls itself Scotland's Mural Town. The murals are lovely. The high street isn't, and the Panners go to Musselburgh or Edinburgh for their shopping.
There's 1 pub in the whole town. The bins get collected so rarely that people built their own bin shelters, and that turned into a row with the council. A town with an industrial museum, arguing about how to hide a wheelie bin. 2 of the 10 takeaways inspected were told to improve, more than twice the typical Scottish town's share. Tranent's Belters are just up the hill, and the Panners have never liked them.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Prestonpans's 62 for sewage spills means it's crapper than 62% of towns.
- Sewage spills62/100458 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2025
- Fly-tipping50/100
- Broadband46/1005.5% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 12.2% across the East Lothian council area
- Criminal damage and arson45/1006.7 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Food hygiene41/1004.0% told to improve, of the 50 food businesses inspected
- Deliberate fires37/10014.8 per 10,000 people a year, April 2023 to March 2026
- Rain34/100122 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Anti-social behaviour19/1005.4 per 1,000 people a year, January 2023 to December 2025
- Serious road collisions13/1000.9 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Air pollution10/1005.5 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 4.7 of fine particles, 2024 average
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Musselburgh | 74 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.2 | Haddington | 27 |
| 3 | Tranent | 20 |
| 4 | Prestonpans | 18 |
| 5 | Dunbar | 13 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Prestonpans by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 48.7 crimes per 1,000 people a year (January 2023 to December 2025) Better: 10% lower than the typical Scottish town's 54.4
- 3 reports of broken street lights on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 2.8 per 10,000 people, 3.1x the typical Scottish town's 0.9
What's left on the high street
- 1 pub, 2 hairdressers, 1 charity shop, 1 bookmaker, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 20.0% of takeaways inspected told to improve (2 of 10) Worse: 2.2x the typical Scottish town's 9.1%
- 1 public toilet on the map (October 2026) Worse: 0.9 per 10,000 people, 44% lower than the typical town's 1.6
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.32am last bus out on a Wednesday Better: Later than the typical town's 12.14am
- Under 0.1% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: Far lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 2.7% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 83% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,473 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
East Lothian council
- £1,698 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £45 more than the Scottish average
- 34% of East Lothian council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Better: 6% lower than Scotland's 36%
- 38 ombudsman complaints decided in 2025-26, 1 upheld About the same: 33.8 per 100,000 residents, about the same as Scotland's 34.7
- 91.0% of the streets checked passed as clean (2025-26) About the same: About the same as Scotland's 92.2%
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Prestonpans against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.