Crap Towns / West Glamorgan / Gorseinon
Gorseinon
25/100Crap Score
740th crappest of 984 towns, and 5th in West Glamorgan. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
Got something to say about Gorseinon? Write in.
agree it's crap have defended it
Move your bloody car
Gorseinon's main sport is parking where you shouldn't. It's very good at it.
Gorseinon used to do coal, steel and tinplate. Now its big industry is parking on the High Street where you shouldn't and across other people's drives. The station's long gone. There are weeds on the High Street, graffiti round the skate park and a lot of charity shops.
The rain turns up on 164 days a year and the overflows run for over ten times as long as the typical town's, so the river never gets a day off.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Gorseinon's 97 for sewage spills means it's crapper than 97% of towns.
- Sewage spills97/1002,861 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Rain88/100164 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Food hygiene50/1002.5% rated 0 to 2, of the 81 food businesses with a rating
- Deliberate fires50/100
- Fly-tipping44/10010.1 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Swansea council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Criminal damage and arson27/1005.4 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Broadband25/1003.3% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 8.4% across the Swansea council area
- Anti-social behaviour16/1009.5 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Air pollution8/1005.5 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 4.5 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Serious road collisions0/1000.4 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Port Talbot | 53 |
| 2 | Swansea | 46 |
| 3 | Neath | 40 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.4 | Baglan | 32 |
| 5 | Gorseinon | 25 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Gorseinon by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 51.8 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 32% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 19 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 13.5 per 10,000 people, 4x the typical town's 3.4
What's left on the high street
- 4 pubs, 5 hairdressers, 5 charity shops, 2 bookmakers, 1 vape shop, 3 banks, 1 Greggs on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 0.0% of takeaways rated 0 to 2 for hygiene (0 of 16) Better: Against the typical town's 4.0%
- 1 bank branch closure announced since 2022 Worse: 7.1 per 100,000 people, 2.1x the typical town's 3.4
- 1 public toilet on the map (October 2026) Worse: 0.7 per 10,000 people, 56% lower than the typical town's 1.6
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 11.50pm last bus out on a Wednesday Worse: Earlier than the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.3% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Better: 40% lower than the typical town's 0.5%
- 15.0% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space About the same: About the same as the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,519 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Swansea council
Have a crap-off
Gorseinon against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.