Crap Towns / West Sussex / Barnham
Barnham
60/100Crap Score
392nd crappest of 984 towns, and 6th in West Sussex. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
Got something to say about Barnham? Write in.
agree it's crap have defended it
Barnham. Where you change trains.
You change trains here. Don't get off.
Barnham's claim to fame is being where you change for Bognor. It scores crapper than Bognor, which takes some doing. The roads flood, Barnham Road keeps shutting, and commuters nick every space by the shops. There's a windmill. That's it.
Then the sewage. The storm overflows round the place spilled for 14.5 times as long as the typical town's, and it's a village. They keep building houses on top of all that anyway, and a third of premises can't get gigabit broadband, so the new lot can't even stream something to take their minds off the smell.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Barnham's 99 for sewage spills means it's crapper than 99% of towns.
- Sewage spills99/1003,968 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2024 to 2025
- Broadband97/10034.0% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 17.7% across the Arun council area
- Serious road collisions80/1003.6 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
- Deliberate fires58/100
- Criminal damage and arson47/1006.8 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Fly-tipping42/1009.7 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Arun council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Anti-social behaviour36/10012.9 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Rain32/100121 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Air pollution23/1005.8 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 6.1 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Food hygiene20/1000.0% rated 0 to 2, of the 51 food businesses with a rating
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 2 | Chichester | 82 |
| 3 | Crawley | 67 |
| 4 | Wick | 61 |
| 5 | Shoreham-by-Sea | 61 |
| 6 | Barnham | 60 |
| 7 | Southwick | 55 |
| 8 | Bognor Regis | 53 |
| 9 | East Grinstead | 45 |
| 10 | Worthing | 44 |
Barnham by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 71.6 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 6% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 6 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Worse: 5.9 per 10,000 people, 1.7x the typical town's 3.4
- 3 serious pollution incidents within 1 km since 2016, the latest in 2026
What's left on the high street
- 4 pubs, 4 hairdressers, 1 charity shop on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 3 public toilets on the map (October 2026) Better: 3.0 per 10,000 people, 1.9x the typical town's 1.6
- None public swimming pools open Worse: Against the typical English town's 0.7 per 10,000 people
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.26am last bus out on a Wednesday About the same: About the same as the typical town's 12.14am
- 2.9% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 5.8x the typical town's 0.5%
- 10.5% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Better: 32% lower than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,816 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) Better: 19% higher than the typical town's 1,532
Arun council
- £2,487 Band D council tax (2026-27) About the same: £95 more than the English average
- 19% of West Sussex County Council's unclassified roads should have been considered for maintenance (2025-26) Worse: 19% higher than England's 16%
- 4 ombudsman complaints upheld against the council in 2025-26
- More on the council
Have a crap-off
Barnham against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.