Crap Towns / Mid Glamorgan / Church Village
Church Village
35/100Crap Score
640th crappest of 984 towns, and 10th in Mid Glamorgan. Higher scores are crapper.
Have your say
Crap Town of the Year 2026/27
See the raceThe public vote. It's separate from the Crap Score, and it closes on 31 December 2027.
Letters from the locals
Got something to say about Church Village? Write in.
agree it's crap have defended it
Bypass? What bypass?
They campaigned for years for a bypass. Then they built houses all along it.
Church Village fought for a bypass for years and finally got one. Then they built a load of new houses and the traffic came straight back. The old main road's as busy as ever and the cycle path doesn't join up with anything.
Not much crime, so everyone moans about the sewage. Fair enough: the storm overflows go off for over six times the typical town's hours. And it pisses down on 170 days a year. It's shit, and it's wet.
What the score is made of
Ten ingredients, each marked out of 100. Higher is crapper.
Church Village's 92 for rain means it's crapper than 92% of towns.
- Rain92/100170 days of rain a year, at least 1 mm, 1991 to 2020 average
- Sewage spills92/1001,742 spill hours per 10,000 people a year, storm overflows within 1 km, 2023 to 2025
- Fly-tipping71/10015.3 incidents per 1,000 people a year, Rhondda Cynon Taf council area, 2022-23 to 2024-25
- Food hygiene64/1004.3% rated 0 to 2, of the 47 food businesses with a rating
- Broadband57/1004.6% of premises can't get gigabit, January 2026, and 18.6% across the Rhondda Cynon Taf council area
- Deliberate fires50/100
- Air pollution29/1007.7 µg/m³ of nitrogen dioxide and 5.4 of fine particles, 2024 average
- Criminal damage and arson3/1003.0 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Anti-social behaviour3/1006.3 per 1,000 people a year, September 2023 to August 2026
- Serious road collisions0/1000.4 per 10,000 people a year, fatal and serious, 2021 to 2025
| Pos | Town | Score |
|---|---|---|
| 6 | Maesteg | 53 |
| 7 | Tonypandy | 52 |
| 8 | Mountain Ash | 49 |
| 9 | Tonyrefail | 44 |
| In danger of becoming nice from here down.10 | Church Village | 35 |
| 11 | Bridgend | 32 |
| 12 | Pyle | 25 |
| 13 | Sarn | 10 |
| 14 | Porthcawl | 9 |
Below the dashed line: in danger of becoming nice.
Church Village by numbers
Thinking of moving here? Don't say we didn't warn you.
Crime, muck and dodgy water
- 35.7 crimes per 1,000 people a year (September 2023 to August 2026) Better: 53% lower than the typical town's 76.2
- 4 reports of potholes and bad road surfaces on FixMyStreet, the most reported problem in the year to October 2026 Better: 2.8 per 10,000 people, 18% lower than the typical town's 3.4
What's left on the high street
- 8 pubs, 3 hairdressers, 1 bank on the map here as of 1 October 2026
- 1 public toilet on the map (October 2026) Worse: 0.7 per 10,000 people, 56% lower than the typical town's 1.6
Getting about, getting online, getting rained on
- 12.19am last bus out on a Wednesday About the same: About the same as the typical town's 12.14am
- 0.7% of premises can't get superfast broadband (January 2026) Worse: 40% higher than the typical town's 0.5%
- 20.1% live more than 400 metres from a park or play space Worse: 30% higher than the typical town's 15.5%
- 1,533 hours of sunshine a year (1991 to 2020 average) About the same: About the same as the typical town's 1,532
Rhondda Cynon Taf council
Have a crap-off
Church Village against your mate's town, and a match ticket to rub it in.
- ?Fly-tippingper 1,000, council area?
- ?Anti-social behaviourper 1,000 people?
- ?Serious road crashesper 10,000 people?
- ?Sewage spillshours per 10,000 people?
- ?Food hygienerated poor?
- ?Criminal damageper 1,000 people?
- ?Dirty airµg/m³?
- ?No gigabitof premises can't get it?
- ?Deliberate firesper 10,000 people?
- ?Raindays a year?
Ten ingredients. One verdict. Who's crapper? The higher Crap Score takes it.